Hello, Tim!
Today is the last day living in Xindian, and it also happened to be the first day of August.
8/1, Wednesday
The mishap happened once again!
Being so tired, I didn’t even remember myself hitting the snooze button on my cell phone, and hence I was late for the breakfast AGAIN! Candy called me, and after she heard a muffled, apparently-just-out-of-bed voice, she understood, and the same curt hanging up the phone (which was only two days ago), and the same me, feeling like a very horrible person, standing someone up the second time in three days.
I was contemplating all the way on the metro, thinking about how I should apologize, but I knew it was meaningless. You see, I have a bad habit, and it was that I give out my apologies too easily. Every single event, even those of the most trifle things that turned out to be wrong, I apologize. I don’t necessarily take the blame all the time, but there I was, always saying sorry. There was actually one time in middle school, where I unintentionally offended a guy named Jack, and I kept saying ‘Sorry’ to him to an extent when he told me to ‘quit saying sorry’, and guess what I said in response?
‘Oh, okay. Sorry.’ That just came out of my mouth without further thought. I think the word ‘sorry’ has embedded itself into one of my reflexes, and it doesn’t make me look sincere; instead, all the incessant sorry’s make my apologies cheap. I don’t like that. Back on the metro where I was pondering, I reached a conclusion; I am not going to say sorry, but in place of that, I am going to tell her how lame I was for being late again, and just show her I knew that I was wrong. It was probably better than the numerous times of ‘Sorry about that’s and ‘This won’t happen again’s.
I really need to work on my apologizing skills and understand the right times to do so, or I would keep offending people no matter how bad I feel.
My mom hired a cleaner to our new house to deal with the bathroom stains and the dirty balcony and kitchen today, and tomorrow the moving company would come to our house in Xindian for the furniture and all the other things we want to be moved over here at nine in the morning. Since Dad is away at work on a ship, I had to be with Mother to help with the moving, meaning that I won’t be at school tomorrow.
I was lying on the floor in the living room at sleep time, and I thought about going through every amazing thing that happened when we were living in this house, but I was too tired to let the thoughts go in my mind, so I think I dozed off when I only started picturing the first time I visited the house with my parents, my cousin, and Eliza, the grownups arranging matters with the landlord while Eliza and I sitting on the brown couch goofing around… I knew that I would miss this place dearly. This is the place where some highlights of my seventeen-year-old life took place. If life were a play, that house was the stage. At this moment, several specific events ran past my mind, one including a cup of freshly-made frozen yogurt pineapple smoothie, but those memories are better left unsaid, for they feel sweeter that way.
This is the last night.
This is all for today.
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